Friday, October 29, 2010

At a Crossroad

AsSalaamu alaikum my dear readers. I know I am so infrequent with my blog post. Please forgive me. Many times I have the intention to blog but either time escapes me or I just have a serious case of writers block.
Alhamdulillah I have been doing well. THe little one is good as well. He just turned 1 a few weeks ago. Can you believe its been a whole year? The things that can happen in that amount of time. How children grow so much. They start out as these little helpless beings, that depend on you for everything. Then they start to grow and develop into independent beings, still very much dependent but more of a mind of their own. My son just amazes me everyday. He is this little ball of energy, full of life, and a great personality. He thinks he is grown and does what he wants to do and throws and serious tantrum at times if you try to tell him otherwise. But most of the time he is the sweetest little thing ever who loves hugs and kisses and cuddling. He is just filled with love. Every morning I look forward to seeing his face and just talking with him. He is so conversational. Of course a lot of it you can't understand, but I love his little babbling.
Being a mom is a wonderful feeling, but it is also a bit challenging at times. You want the best for your children and hope that you are doing whatever you can to make sure they have a good life. Sometimes people can get in the way of that. My family and I don't really see eye to eye on certain things. I'm the only one who really practices in my family, only Allah knows what they have in their hearts. Alhamdulillah they help me whenever they can and I am highly grateful but certain things I can't stand nor tolerate. The constant swearing, aggressiveness, not praying, etc..that I do not want my son around. Yes he is young now but he is at the age where he starts to mimic the things he sees and hears.
Now here is the dilemma do I stay or do I go?
He has been around my family since day one and he is really attached to my mom and brothers. Alhamdulillah he has a great relationship with them. This is basically home to him, but Im just concerned about what he is learning and is it going to affect him. I want my son to have stability and to be around those who love him but at what cost. DO I have him around


Nisa said...

Assalaamu 'alaikum sis

Its nice to see you blogging again....mashaAllah mubrook on your little boy turning 1! InshaAllah my son is about to turn 1 in a couple of weeks time...time has flown by and I can't believe a year has gone by since he was born..

It's a tough situation you're facing...I'm not sure I can give you the right advise as its obvious there are pros and cons in staying with your family. The only question is I suppose is what is your alternative right now? If you were to not live with your family, where would you be raising your boy? Of course kids are so impressionable but also need love and attachment. Have you spoken to your mum and brothers about your concerns?

I hope Allah swt makes it easy for you. Many duas your way, Saima

Anonymous said...

The being a good mom ship sailed when you and your baby daddy broke up before the kid was born. Irresponsible.

Anonymous said...

Asalamalaikum darling. I completely understand where ur coming from on the family issue. I live with my inlaws, who are helpful but a bit verbally violent or aggressive with one another. And my son was such a calm and collected baby but now that hes a year old hes throwing temper tantrums. I know hes young and doesnt know any better but somehow it makes you wonder if the adults are the ones responsible for this bad behavior, and if so what can we do to resolve it? I get scared that my inlaws might get upset and take it the wrong way if i bring it up.