Monday, March 21, 2011

To Take or Not to Take?

I've been debating the issue of whether or not to take birth control. I am to be married soon, inshaAllah and Ive discussed it with my future husband(actually ex-husband) and we decided that we do not want children right away and if it is the will of Allah.And no I'm not being pessimisstic in anyway. I don't go into a marriage thinking it isn't going to work. If I have my doubts in the beginning I just don't do it. Anyway, the reason being to really establish our relationship and that of out son's and our whole family dynamic. I have an appointment coming up with my doctor and I am going to discuss my options with her. It is a bit confusing all the birth control mumbo jumbo and so many different kinds, you have the combination pill, mini pill, the patch, pills with low estrogen, etc, etc, that its kind of hard to choose. I guess you just choose the one that is best for you and your situation. Like I plan, inshaAllah to have another child in the near future, I don't really like taking pills and have a habit of forgetting to take them, but considering the other options I think the pill be best(I'm not getting an IUD insert,and noway am I going to insert something up there and then have to fish out later). Now the next thing is which pill:combo or mini. Just in short and without having to go into so much detail(you can look it up for yourself)the combination pill contains estrogen and progesterone and.The mini pill has just progesterone in it and very small amounts of estrogen.
As for the Islamic viewpoint on it, its a bit controversial. Some ulema say its not allowed at all, that the purpose of marriage is to have children. According to others, it isn't allowed just to be a convienience but there has to be some need for it like the mother's health might be jeopardized by another pregnancy and just out of plain necessity. For the full fatwa click here .
Now to me the best spacing for kids is two years for this gives your body enough time to somewhat "heal" from the last pregnancy, especially if you've had a c-section. Trust me it really throws your body out of whack. I still feel like Im recooperating in someway. Anyway what are your thoughts?

7 comments:

Angel said...

As i nurse i recommend the bar it works really well, and if breast feeding you can use this form of contraception. also u dont have to worry about taking a tablet, its interested in your arms lasts 3years and as soon as you remove it your period will return to normal and u can get pregnant again.

~x Aisha x~ said...

hey i am having this issue right now and i am currently using the patch. please please please before you take anything do your research! IUDs are NOT ALLOWED in islam, as their main way of working is preventing fertilization, HOWEVER if this fails, the "plan B" is that they stop the fertilized egg from implanting in your wall, aka they cause an abortion, basically the same technique as the morning after pill. unfortunately not a lot of muslim women know this and get the iud and then realise later, by then who knows what would have happened! i also had a c-section so im taking things slow, anyways i recommend doing something that you can remove, e.g. the patch or contraceptive pill. then you can see if its for you..sorry about the long comment lol but all the best, if you have any questions about the patch id be happy to help :)

umm muhammad sa'd said...

Assalaamu alaikum

Have you considered keeping a track of your cycle and just avoiding the days you are fertile? Or when the man withdraws?

I don't think pills or patches are good for the body in the long run. You are young and inshaAllah a child will be conceived when the time is right for you and your husband.

Btw when there is a doubt in a matter and differences of opinion (the majority in this case that it is not permissible unless there is danger to the woman's life), it is best to avoid.

Yasmin (Umm Zayd) said...

Angel,
I don't think I'm to keen on using the bar. I really don't want anything inserted in my arm. And do they even have that here in the US.

Aisha,
Yeah I wouldn't get an IUD even if they weren't haraam. And the plan B pill is just another name for an abortion pill. Sorry if Im offending anyone but if you are married why would you really need to take plan B. I'm considering using the patch as an alternative because I am horrible with remembering to take pills. But how is the patch? Are the side effects the same as the pill? I thought there was a huge controversy over the patch?

Umm muhammad,
Wa alaikum assalaam, my cycle has been pretty irregular after Ive had my son so that wouldn't really work for me. Even with withdrawal there is still a chance for a woman to get pregnant. And everything happens by the will of Allah. If I go on the pill, I wouldn't be on them for very long, so its only a short term option right now and Allah knows best.

Thank you all for the advice. Jazak Allah khairun.

~x Aisha x~ said...

oh im so glad you agree! its so scary the information out there is really unreliable and a lot of sisters are confused by all these different treatments..i am in the same position as you atm, i had a c-section and really want to wait at least another 18 months b4 having another child as i feel my body is still recovering...well the patch is a nightmare! i have stopped it as within one week of using it i gained 2 pounds, felt nauseous, and had circulation problems in my legs. and yes i found out they contain 60% more hormone than the pill and apparently 40 women have died from it so nope def not using that again! i am going to try the normal pill for now, but the only other alternative i can see is the implant in your arm, or possibly the vaginal ring, as you can remove that and it doesnt interfere with your hormones :) ill tell you if i find anything better as i am on a quest atm lol!

fatima said...

AssalaamuAlaikum

I know this is an older post of yours and I'm not entirely sure how I ended up here but I'm glad to have found your blog.

I just wanted to clear up a slight misconception you and a fellow reader have regarding Plan B. Plan B or any other emergency contraceptive pill is NOT an abortion pill. If a woman decides to take it and her egg has already been fertilized, it will not affect the fertilized egg, meaning the pregnancy. ECP induces a woman's period but if there is a fertilized egg it won't. Same thing with hormonal pill birth control. It is possible to get pregnant while on the pill (happened to my sister-in-law) and if you continue to take the pill and not realize you are pregnant immeadiately, it won't affect the fertilized egg, nor cause you to miscarry. From what I remember from my biology classes, when you ovulate and the egg is released from the ovum it sticks to the uterus wall lining, it does not need to be fertilized to be there. ECP causes the lining to shed as long as there are no fertilized eggs there. I know I sound like I'm repeating a bit but I want to cover all of the bases. As for why would someone who's married need ECP? Quite honestly it's not for anyone to judge except for Allah SWT. There are different circumstances and if none of them have ever happened to you then just be thankful you've never had to consider them.

Also are you thinking of using female birth control as your only source of protection? What about condoms? They don't involve any hormones that would affect your body if you're worried about that. Plus, when it's time for a child to be made, all the condoms and pills can't stop Allah's will. :O) And also Allah knows and understands your intentions, so do whatever it is you do with a pure heart. If it's because you're worried about your soon to be spouse (and for good reason) than I think it is understandable.

Regarding the pill, I took the low dosage TryCyclen Lo pill because they mimic the body's own hormone production and it has the least amount of side effects and I haven't felt anything since I stopped taking them. For the pills, it's best to accompany them with an activity, breakfast or lunch, something like that. I am very thirsty first thing in the morning and as soon as I hit the alarm I drink water. That's when I used to take mine. Plus, with the pills, even if you forget, it won't affect you if you take it within 8 hrs of your regular time, like 9 am is your regular time and you remember it at 4 pm, no worries, you'll be fine, just take them.

Good luck with everything.

mena said...

Sister *aisha*, pls do you have or can refer me to a daleel that states using a IUD is haram?