If I Only Knew

I wish they would tell you before you get pregnant that sleeping comfortable in the last trimester is impossible. I don't think I've had a good night's rest in weeks. The only real sleep I get is any naps that I might get during the day. Its frustrating. Its making me moody, depressed, and everything in between. And they say rest up before the baby comes because they'll be no such thing as sleep. If only I could. I guess by the time I give birth Im gonna be a complete zombie. So if you see me blogging nonesense just know that I may be sleepwalking.

Day 2 of Ramadan

Alhamdulillah Ramadan is going pretty good. Yesterday it really didn't feel like it to me. I guess Im really used to being at the masjid around this time or having iftar with a lot of people. For nos its been peaceful and quiet since Im home mostly by myself. I guess also since Im not fasting, the reality hasn't really set in.
I know of few pregnant women who do fast but being a little over 34 weeks Ive opted out. For one if I dont eat on a regular basis, I get severe headaches and nausea. Even if I don't drink water, I feel my body really slowing down. I wish I could fast but right now the health of me and my baby are important. Plus my doctor has advised me not too especially since Ive already lost a pound within a week and thats with barely moving and eating. Its too risky. In all honesty, Im not looking to make up the whole month, but I know I have to. In due time I will and insha'Allah Allah will make it easy for me.
Insha'Allah, I pray that Allah(SWT) make all of your fast easy on you and accept all of them. Keep me in your duas.

Ramadan Mubarak

Wishing you all a very blessed Ramadan. May Allah (SWT) accept our fast and duas.

You Wouldn't Believe What Happened

Well yesterday started off as a normal, regular day. I had a doctor's appointment in the morning, everything was well. I came home and relaxed. Around 7 I had went on a hospital tour of the maternity ward. Pretty interesting huh?! After I was home, prayed my salaat. I wasn't feeling too good so I was laying down in my room until I got hungry and went downstairs in the kitchen to eat.
It was a pretty bad thunderstorm. You can hear the lightining striking every few seconds. So I was sitting at the table in the kitchen eating my dinner. Right when I finished, I started to take sip of my apple juice and outta no wear you hear this big boom, see this flash of light and the next thing I knew I felt a big shock go up my right foot into my leg. The cup dropped from my hands and I screamed. At first I really didn't no what happened. I was kinda in a state of shock (no pun intended). It took a while to register what had happened. My foot and my leg were hurting pretty bad at first then I just shook it off. I thought I was fine. Then I was checking to see if the baby was moving since he was moving right before it happened. I monitored his movement for about an hour and didn't feel anything so it had me really worried. I called the doctor and she told me to go to the ER to be checked out.

So at 12 mid, I made my way to the ER. They had me hooked up to fetal monitors, making sure I didn't have any burns. Alhamdulillah, the baby and I are ok. The baby is healthier than ever and I couldn't be happier. I didn't get home til almost 5 in the morning but at least Im ok.

Right now Im just kinda laughing at what happened, even though it really isn't a laughing matter. It's more like did I really get shocked by lightining?! I mean how many people do you know that has happened too. Also what's funny is that I just toured the labor and delivery floor and now I got a personal tour. This time instead of looking at everything from afar I got to test it out. Can't beat that huh?

Well now I know when its a really bad thunderstorm dont eat your dinner at a rod iron table on a tiled floor barefoot that just makes you the perfect conductor. Boy do I have a story to tell my son when he gets older, insha'Allah. Maybe he might come out with a mohawk or a lightining bolt scar on his forehead like Harry Potter lol. But its definitely something to remember.

Baby Update

I had my 34 week check-up today and alhamdulillah my little munchkin and I are doing well. I also passed my glucose test YAY!! That was good news to hear. Baby's heartbeat is nice and strong, it should be with all the moving he does. He is already head down just waiting til the big day and breaking my pelvis in two at the same time. One funny thing is that I lost one pound. The doctor said its completely normal to lose a few pounds at this stage. So that's one less pound to carry around, not like it makes a big difference just one down 25 more to go.
I keep having this weird dream where my water breaks while at Eid prayer. Maybe Im just being paranoid but that would be a great story to tell if it did. Allahu alim.

Ramadan is approaching

Time is flying by so fast. Last Ramadan seems like it was only yesterday and now its here again. In all honesty I don't know if Im really prepared for it. I guess this year will be a lot different than last year.
Last Ramadan was pretty good alhamdulillah. I was single and working, which didn't interfere with my fasting. The great part about my job was that I only worked about 3 days a week so I was still able to be in the masjid on my days off and had a lot of time to read and pray. I always loved being in the masjid. At the time, it was so much better than being home. It felt great being around other Muslim sisters. I definitely made a lot of new friends and was able to see old friends. That sisterhood and togetherness is what I loved so much and I guess that's what I love about every Ramadan.
This Ramadan most likely is gonna be a bit different. For one, Im 8 1/2 months pregnant, so I wont be able to fast. It's kinda a bummer, some might say Im lucky, but I'd still have to make up all those days afterwards. At least now I can focus on doing more optional salaat, du'a, reading Qur'an. Another thing that kinda bothers me is that I just moved to a complete new state so I don't really know anyone besides one person. I haven't been to the masjid at all, mostly because everytime I had the intention on going I ended not feeling well. Also the masjid closest to my house is pretty small so only the brothers go there. The other masjid is about 30 mins. away and at this time I don't like traveling too far from home unless I necessarily have to.
I've always wanted to have one big iftaar every week and invite a lot of sisters over. Especially now since I have a lot of space in my new home it would be absolutely perfectI always have the intention to cook but my body really limits me nowadays from doing any hardwork. So really my intentions for this Ramadan is just too take it easy and just focus on my deen. What better way could you spend Ramadan?

All is Well For Now

I had my glucose screening test today. Wasn't too bad I suppose. Well having to drink that nasty stuff was the worse part for me. And to my surprise the nurse asked me which flavor I wanted, fruit punch or orange? Im like wow I get to pick my poison, fun. Like one was suppose to taste better than the other?! I stuck with orange which tasted like flat orange soda mixed with something that I can't even describe. All I know is that my baby got a good sugar rush from it. He was kicking and squirming the entire 3 hours I was there at the office. He is usually quiet that time of morning but I guess you give a high dosage of sugar to anyone and they'll be up and moving too.

Anyway I'll find out Monday if I have GD or not. If I do I'll get a call around 12 noon, if I don't no call. Kinda weird isn't it but oh well. Insha'Allah I won't receive a phone call, but if I do I'll be prepared for it.

I Failed

Today I had to go to the doctor to do my glucose screening test, which screens for gestational diabetes. It's a simple procedure where you have to fast the night before (I couldn't eat or drink anything after 11pm). You then have to get your blood drawn so they can check your glucose levels. Well mine weren't like sky high but I failed by just a few points. They want it to be below 100, mines was 103, so not too far off. So now I have to go in tomorrow morning (another 8 am appointment-ugh) and do a 3 hour tolerance test. For this test I have to drink that lovely orange concoction and have blood drawn every hour for 3 hours. Sounds like a lot of fun.

The results today just kinda threw me off track. I was a bit worried at first. The nurse said there isn't anything to worry about. Just because I failed the test today doesn't mean I have gestational diabetes. I really hope not. It's strange because Ive maintained a pretty healthy diet even before I was pregnant. I wasn't too crazy on the junk food or candy, only once in a while. I read that only 4 to 7 percent of pregnant women do develop gestational diabetes and those more at risk are older women, obese women, those who have a family history of diabetes, and Native Americans, Latin Americans, and African Americans. I don't fit into the obese or older woman part, but my family does have a history diabetes (my father, grandfather, and grandmother had it) and Im part African American and Native American.

I guess I shouldn't freak myself out right now. Alhamdulillah, atleast everything else is completely normal. Insha'Allah all will be well and I'll let you know what happens tomorrow. Just keep me in your duas.

I Was Right All Along

I had went to my doctor's appointment today and finally found out the sex of my little one. Alhamdulillah its a BOY. I wasn't overly thrilled because I had a feeling that it was a boy all along. They say boys tend to move and kick a lot more than girls. All I can say is that Im carrying a little kick boxer.
As for everything else, the doctor says Im perfectly healthy, everything is normal. Basically a textbook pregnancy. No complications whatsoever. Lucky to say that Ive only gained 22 pounds since before I was pregnant which is a good thing since Im suppose to stay within 25-35 lbs. So Im on track. Now I have to my doctor every 2 weeks from this point on and once I hit 36 weeks, every single week until I pop. Boy how time seriously flies. It seems like a moment ago I just found out I was pregnant and now Im gonna be giving birth, insha'Allah in 8 weeks. I feel so blessed.

Sometimes I Feel Like Going Naked

Nowadays Ive found clothes to be kinda annoying. My body is going thru all these changes so fast that I can barely keep up. It first hits you in those first couple of months when you can't button your pants and your shirt starts to feel a little more snug.
At first I was fine, I could easily throw my abaya on and it wouldn't be a problem but now I honestly can't stand wearing abaya. It's really hard for me to say that because I love my abayas and practically wore one everday. Its one of the easiest outfits to put on. But for some reason they just aren't as comfortable. Well I know why one isn't so comfortable because I went to go put in on a month and found it to be a little to tight in certain places. I think I stared in the mirror in horror. I couldn't believe my body had changed so fast.
I haven't gained much weight at all. Besides for my belly getting bigger and chest being slightly larger (make that humongous), my body is pretty much still the same.
Back to my abayas, I have no idea why I dislike them so much. They are loose and have room for me to move but I guess sometimes I feel like they just don't fit right anymore with my stomach. I find myself trying to adjust it and it gets irritating. If only the made maternity abayas maybe that would help. So I won't be buying any new abayas til after the baby is born.

Ive always kinda hated the idea of maternity clothes. Some of the clothes look horrendous or fit so snug to the body to the point where you wonder how is that gonna fit. Plus I also find it a waste of money. When you're pregnant you grow so fast that your clothes can't keep up, so it makes no sense to run out and but a whole new wardrobe soon as you start to show. The only that I bought that is from the maternity section are nursing bras and pants. For the pants, I say just to buy 2 or 3 pairs, one in black and the other in a neutral color. Those can easily be worked into any wardrobe.
What I've been wearing lately are a lot of dresses. Since maxi dresses are in style and you can find them in almost any store, they have been a lifesaver. Alhamdulillah Ive been able to find really nice ones that are loose enough and just to make sure they wont be snug I just go one size up. Only Allah knows how big my belly will get, so it's better to be safe than sorry. I can always easily take them in afterwards. All the other clothes I have I bought in regular sizes. All I did was go one size up, that way I can wear it when I wont have a big watermelon in my stomach.

Also what has been a lifesaver is shopping in my moms closet. She had a lot of clothers that she didn't wear or anymore or is too big for her since she lost weight and I just snatched whatever I could. Thamks to her I have a closet full of clothes that I can wear that I don't feel like tearing off.
I still have those days where I don't wanna wear anything because I get so hot. This baby is like my own personal heater. I just radiate so much heat. Perfect in the winter, not so cool when its 90 degrees out. A lot of ice cold water and cool air helps.

Only 9 more weeks to go insha'Allah...........

Settling back down

I've been back two days now and trying to settle back into some type of routine. When I was in NY everything was shot to hell, my eating schedule and especially my sleep. It's like the bigger your belly gets during pregnancy the harder it is to sleep. Im normally a stomach sleeper but of course thats out the window. It's like sleeping on a big watermelon now. I've been kept up by night by heartburn, which I never had before in my life until and now I know why its called heartburn. What also drives me a little nuts are these crazy hunger pangs I get early in the morning. Ive been up many of times at 5 in the morning fixing something to eat just to wake up 2 hours later and be hungry again. I don't think Ive ever ate so much in my life. But hey whatever the little one needs I don't hesitate no matter how annoying it may be.
So far I've been having a pretty good pregnancy. It's been a very ttextbook pregnancy nothing out of the ordinary. The baby moves around a lot, I dont have any preeclampsia, gestational diabetes, no swelling at all, no anemia, no serious issue. Ive only been plagued with from time to time bad backaches and fatigue but alhamdulillah its getting better.
The only thing which I found to be odd was that I was a bit depressed from time to time. I had days where all I wanted to do was sleep. I would get irritated and annoyed very easily and for the silliest things. Crying became almost an everyday habit. At times I felt like I wasn't gonna be a good mother or I was in someway hurting my baby and kept apologizing for it. Sometimes I wouldn't wanna talk to anyone and just wanted to be left alone. It got so bad where I couldn't sleep at night and where I would lose my appetite but would force myself to eat. I really thought I was going crazy. I always heard of postpartum depression but never being depressed while you are pregnant. But my doctor said its more normal than I thought, that it happens to a good amount of women. I was a bit relieved by it but the only things is that women who suffer with depression during pregnancy are more likely to develop postpartum depression.
Alhamdulillah Im doing so much better. Fortunately I didn't have to take any anti-depression medication. I just really started to take it easy and spend more time just relaxing and taking things easy. Lots and lots of du'a has helped also. I still cry very easily but what pregnant women doesn't? Im happy and excited and I feel truly blessed and can't wait to meet my little one. Insha'Allah all will be well.

Guess Who?

As-Salaamu Alaikum everyone. I know Ive been gone for such a long time and I see a lot of emails asking where Ive been but im back now. I guess my little vacation to NY turned out to be a loong vacation (if I could call it that). Ive been away for a little over 3 months and alhamdulillah it was a good time. I got to spend a lot of time with my mom and family, something I haven't really done. It was somewhat relaxing minus my 2 brothers who would wake me up early in the morning to terrorize me. That's what brothers are for. I got back in last night after crazy delays due to the lovely rain. I was on the plane sitting on the tarmac for 2 hours before we took off then add that to a 3 hour flight, not fun at all.
Alhamdulillah Im feeling absolutely great. Im healthy, happy, and renewed. I definitely missed all of you and I know I have a lot of catching up to do which might take me another 3 months lol but I don't mind. Gives me something to do in my spare time.
I know I put in my last post that I'll have good news when I get back. I guess that news is long overdue. I am pregnant. I know I waited so long to say so. Im 31 weeks now and so ready to get over it. Im really excited about it and can't wait for my little bundle of joy to get here. I decided to not know the sex. I want it to be a surprise. Its just more to look forward to. Doesn't make shopping any easier but I guess I'll manage. Who says a girl always has to be dressed in pink and a boy dressed in blue? I wouldn't be able to stand to see an ocean of pink and blue, thats just me.
Anyway it feels good to be back and can't wait to share more with you but for right now I need to go do something to alleviate my aching back lol. Gotta love babies.