Sunday, October 19, 2008

I'm Missing My Niqab

No I haven't lost my niqab nor did I destroy it. I just miss wearing it. I felt so secure in it. If you ever been to NY you could understand my reason why I wore it. Men have no shame, especially a lot of Muslim men (not all of them), and they used to always say things about how pretty I was or tried to give me their number, all that crap. I took it off mainly for work and those comments started to come back but I just dealt with it. Now Im living somewhere where I don't really need it. People are a lot more respectful and have manners. I haven't had that stare or weird look from people. I still wear my abaya and haven't heard anything.

So Im wondering will it still be the same here if I wore niqab?

I don't really think so. I live in a military town. There is an army base and air force base right where I live (my husband used to be in the air force so that's why we are here til he finishes his degree). And there isn't a big Muslim community at all. Sometimes I feel my husband and I are the only ones. I know people will start being uncomfortable and give me the 'stare' if they saw me with my face covered. They might start with the whole terrorist thing. Boy have I heard that soo many times.

My husband says its my choice if I want to do it and he wouldn't care either way as long as I was happy. Im just torn between should I do it or should I not. I don't really care what people say to an extent, but I just don't wanna put either of us in a bad predicament. I just miss the beauty of it, how good I felt that no one else could see me besides my family, how I felt like I was in my own little world all my own .

So I guess I wont wear it for now, until we move to a bigger city next year, where there is a bigger Muslim population. There is certainly strength in numbers, I guess. I think we see others doing it and being around other Muslims, it gives you the motivation to do it. We'll see what happens.

13 comments:

o0UmmHasan0o said...

maybe if your in a place where wearing the niqab is going to cause you more grief and fitnah to your marriage, then maybe your right to wait until you get into a larger Muslim Community.... but yes i know what its like to want to wear niqab but it has been dangerous too!!

after the bombings in london, i stopped wearing niqab for some time, as i had been threatened when wearing it, i think i was seen as an easy target!! SuphanAllah

Yasmin said...

Wa alaikum assalaam, yeah, if I start wearing it, it might pose a danger here. Ive seen one Muslim sister, who was at my nikah, wear full niqab with an overhead abaya. I should of asked her how she does it, but I was too excited that day to ask lol.

Umm Ismail said...

As salaamou alikum I live in the South and I have begun to Wear Niqab for 2 months now like b4 Ramadhan every time i saw it i got that tickle in my stomach.Like this is right for me. My husband was not to sure but , I did it any way. And what i Realize is i Get the Same Looks as before. But I love Niqab And it is your choice Sis do what you think is Best. Do it for the Sake of Allah, Fear Allah not His creations. No matter what Allah will mak it easy for you. Allaahu Allim

Ummismail

M.J. said...

Salam Alekium Sis, I feel like I can sympathize with you on this one. While I don't and never have worn niqab regularly, I want to try it out for a week and see if it'd improve my emaan or not or if it'd just cause problems like you mentioned. I feel like where I live (NC too!!!) there are a lot of Muslims but very, very few of them don't look down on niqab :/ InshAllah I'll get the courage to put it on and just try it out, but I might wait until I'm on vacation somewhere else so bad feelings won't stick with me if things DO go badly. I'll make dua for us both.

Joyce said...

As salamu alaykum

I stopped wearing niqab a week ago, and I wore it for 5 months. The reason behind it was hard, I do not want to make this world an excuse not to wear it. I never took niqab as fard, but rather Sunnah and for the reward of wearing it.

Anyway I reverted to Islam like a year ago and started niqab in June. I go to a high school and everyone was ok by it. Until this year where I only have one class and I walk back and forth to school and home when I'm done, I get comments from people OUTSIDE too.

Before that I get comments from guys who say I look like a ninja and such. And when I have the nerves to say something back they do that "talk-behind-back" thing where while you walk away, they say stuff like "If that b**** says something to me I'll smack the sh** out of her" (sorry for the language but that';s how it is)

People go up to me in my face and make weird noises as if I don't see them or as if I'm not even human. I even got hurtful comments saying I looked "better" without it from teachers. A sister I know was spit at on the train for wearing niqab covering her eyes.

I also get stupid comments in the summer saying it's hot, and these very immature guys that go to a barber shop on the block near my house make comments about me saying I look stupid and such.

I didn't give up niqab, rather I felt I should take a break before I start or do it all the time. I might have rushed into it too quickly but niqab is a very very special thing to have, I just don't think I'm ready to fully understand it.

Joyce said...

oh yeah and also girls make comments about me too. If I walk by, they make stupid martial arts moves behind me as if I don't feel them in my space and they would just laugh.

Anonymous said...

It's very strange how they generalize terrorists as women who cover everything, and men with big beards and turbans...yet on the news, I hardly ever see terrorists look like that. The ones on the news didn't even have beards and they all wore Western clothing...

Yasmin said...

M.J. Im meaning to ask you where in NC you live, that'll be crazy if you live near me. Think of the possibility lol, but I know this isn't the place to ask. Im just curious. Email if you wish to answer that yazzy204@yahoo.com

o0UmmHasan0o said...

salam yasmin, hey listen i was thinking about you wearing niqab! i found some great videos on youtube, of a sister showing how to style niqab with scarves? take a peek maybe some of them could work for you, you know its there when you need it, and does not cause lots of stares insha'Allah.

Umm Ismail said...

I tell ya Living in South Carolina These don't know how to Act. But i give 2 cents and a Bucket of Crap what they think lol.

Yasmin said...

Wa alaikum salaam,
Umm Hasan, shukran sis, I did check it out and I really like two of the styles. Im always experimenting with hijab and niqab.

Umm Ismail: I love your attitude. Now if it could rub off onto me, then I'll be good lol.

His Sweetheart said...

Sweetie, I advice you not to wear it because I felt the creeps when you were talking about the staring and such related stuff!!

Niqab is a lovely thing. However, you wear hejab which is more than enough especially when it's the Islamic hejab "not showing your hair and nick"!!

Some people take the hejab off for the sake of security, if you're safe with it and you think that niqab might e problematic, then don't do it!!

edaquincy said...

Hello beauty,
dont worry I am a girl like you. I just want to say I support you from so long distance 5000 miles away, Turkey. I am wearing my hijab since I was 11, never be regretful. I dont expect anyone be strong and ready for the comments in the society but please learn to live with. Just let other people know you little, and be enlihten with your thoughts. I hope all of us deserves hijab and fulfill it correctly.
Also, inshallah your divorce will get you khayr. one month is not small amount of time, you can understad people in one minute if you are lucky. Allah inshallah will help you.