Friday, October 10, 2008

It Ends Right Now

Most of you know the drama of my life when I was previously married. I had cut of all connection to my ex-husband. I didn't wanna speak to him or anything.
So it was a bit weird that 3 days I had called one of my friends and she told me that he had called her asking for my number. Alhamdulillah she thought I had changed my number because when she called me to try to see if it was okay to give him my number, my phone was disconnected thanks to no signal. Apparently it seems he erased my number but then it seems like it found it, remembered it or something cuz he texted me yesterday.
It was just so weird. He would send me like 10 messages at a time saying things like 'I miss you, do you still love me, I love you and I want you back, Im so depressed that you aren't in my life, I messed up, I need you'. Does he think Im crazy? Does he think that Im gonna come running back to him.
HELL NOOO!!!! He surely is taking me as a fool right now. I know he's tryna play on my emotions, seeing if Im some sort of feelings for him, but he is completely mistaken. After what he did, I cut my losses a long time ago. There's no way in the world Im going back. I texted him back saying that he can't say things like to me and that Im a married woman, but he kept texting me back. I told my husband about it and he doesn't like it, but he doesn't wanna get involved and I don't want him too. Im tryna settle it on my own. I shouldn of changed my number a long time ago, but you know 21 year olds, we can't remember anything lol.
What he is doing is so disrespectful. What made it even more disrespectful that he sent a text asking me if I consummated my marriage. Subhanallah!! That is none of his damn business. I know he has some alterior motive behind this.
As is says in the Sharia (Islamic Law), if a husband divorces his wife with 3 divorces, she cannot remarry him until she marries another husband, consummates that marriage, and that husband divorces her.
I know that is what he is thinking, but it's not gonna happen. I feel sorry for him in away but it's time to move on a get on with life. He messed up and now he's feeling the pain because he lost someone he know was good. Now it's my husbands time to shine-lol. Insha'Allah, he'll be able to move on and find somone else. May Allah make him a better person and ease his heart.
Now first thing on my list of things to do:- CHANGE MY NUMBER. Hopefully that'll get the message thru lol


Zaenab said...

lol, im so glad your making the right decision alhamduliAllah. hopefully hel realise what he is doin is wrong as you are married and he must move on, he did have his chance afterall.

naeemah said...

Yea girl. Like my fav Alicia Keys song says: "It's called Karma baby!!" Men trip me out with how they do their woman wrong, then they realize what a dumb mistake they made and try and get her back. My friend is going through the same thing right now, but you gotta do what you gotta do:). Changing your # sounds like a good idea!:D

hijabee said...

OMG, the same thing happened to me with this guy that i never even got to marry! He kept texting me after finding out I was married, and even though I told him I was married, he kept doing it. It was so disrespectful and frustrating! I actually received a text from him this morning saying he was sorry while Im still ignoring his texts. I just delete all the texts that I receive from him, he still doesnt get the message!!!!! Mind you, I haven't talked to him for years!!!! go figure!

Yasmin said...

Its absolutely crazy. Some men are crazy and they sau us women are heart-strung. Yea right. Ive deleted all my txt and alhamdulillah he hasn't txtd me yet, we'll see if he got the message. It's just so sad. Its funny because when we were married he would say that if u left me I would easily find someone else and I wouldn't care. Seems like he cant live up to his words.

M.J. said...

i have so many questions about divorce now! i'd thought, from the Quran that a husband and wife could only be married to that same person 3 different times unless for the forth it was after an unconsummated marriage or that different husband passed away. how many times can someone actually get married to the same person then? three or four times?? is it then possible to divorce someone all of those three or four times at one time? i will ask a scholar as well but im just curious now.

Yasmin said...

That is a good question. I know once you are divorced and the womans iddah is over then they can remarry again, since you need a new marriage contract, if they want to and then it starts a brand new period meaning the divorce counter is reset back to zero if you get what I mean. Now if it was the 3rd divorce, then they cannot be remarried or the husband can't take back her back. She still goes through her iddah and she would have to marry someone else, consummate that marriage, and for that husband to divorce her for her to become lawful to the ex-husband. But it has to be done with the correct intention and not done just to make the woman lawful for her ex-husband, otherwise it's invalid and she still remains unlawful to him.
I hope I answered your questioned to my best understanding of it. And Allah knows best.

Yasmin said...
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