Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Guess The 2nd Time isn't a Charm.

Well where do I start? There is so much to say.*sighs* Here I go. Ive decided, well mutually decided to end our marriage (we decided to just end it by khula). I know it seems so sudden and you may say you've only been married a month? But trust me this was the right thing to do. The reason why is becaus it started to turn into a loveless marriage. Why continue to be with someone that has very little attraction to you. You need that in order to make a marriage work. Love, emotion, all plays into that factor and it was surely lacking. Im kinda suprise that Im taking this well, I guess becuase I saw it coming but just didn't want to admit to it. We are just not meant for each other. We are two different people who see things different ways.
Am I hurt? Yeah I cant lie about that because its the last thing I wanted, especially me being married before and that ending in divorce, for good reason. I know this happened for the best. At least we were honest with each other instead of carrying on acting like everything was okay when it really wasnt. I would of felt deceived then. I mean we weren't mean to each other, we never hurt each other, none of that craziness. Some things just dont work out, some people are just not meant to be together. Im accepting of what Allah has decreed even though I wish things were different. Alhamdulillah he is a great man, very respectful, religious. I have nothing bad to say about him and never will. But I guess I need more outta of marriage and he saw he wasn't giving me what I deserved. So instead of being miserable, we just let it go. There's no hard feelings at all. And we've talked through everything and everything will be find. I'll be okay. Life goes on and there's probably someone better out there for me, just haven't found them yet. Insha'Allah I will. But Im not gonna fret I put my trust in Allah. Hopefully the third time is a charm.

14 comments:

Hijabee said...

Subhanallah!
I'm happy that you're taking it well! It must've been a hard decision, and you have to be a strong person to make decisions like this. Know that your sisters are always here if you need anything during this time. I can't even imagine what you must be going through at this moment, but like you said, it was the right decision for you. Do not take it as a failure or think that its the end of the world, it just did not work. Some of the sahabiyats at the time of the prophet saw got married many times before finding the right person. Qadr Allah, everything happens for the best and there is a wisdom behind everything Allah makes us go through. Inshallah, whatever is best for you will happen Yasmin. May Allah make it easy for you, and May Allah give you the best, May he give you patience, and love.

Anonymous said...

Salams Yasmin, I'm so sorry dear. But alhamdulillah you have to do what's best for you. And you seem to be taking things well. Just remember to make duaa and everything will be okay. You're in my prayers and may Allah (S.W.T.) give you the best. Ameen.

Jannah said...

I am so sorry to hear that, sweety. Allah knows what is best for all of us. I am not sure how i can help you but whatever you need that i am capable of doing/giving, let me know inshallah. You have extended family in NY =) May Allah cleanse you of any unhappiness in your life and bless you with only joy... ameen

Inspired Muslimah said...

Salaam sis, I am sorry to hear this but Allah knows best and I will keep you in my hopes and prayers.

HF said...

Not extended family in NY only, in the Gulf too! :P

Ok, since u know its the right thing to do and all, i will pray that you get whtever is khair for you and May Allah guide and protect you. Ameen.

washi said...

Salaam Yasmin, sorry to hear things didnt work out...its best to make a break now rather than later I'm sure. Insha-Allah things will get better...they always do alhamdullilah

Mina said...

Oh no, sorry to hear this Yasmin

Inshallah khair, you know whats best for you and only Allah can truely understand what your going through...

Your in my duaa's:) stay strong.

Yasmin (Umm Zayd) said...

Salaams everyone, thank you so much for the support and lovely words. They do make me feel a bit better. May Allah SWT bless each and every one of you with much khair. Ameen. In time I'll be ok, just keep me in your du'as. Thats the only thing thats getting by right now. Jazakh Allahu khairun.

Anonymous said...

salam yasmin
may Allah's love be with you always,
it sadden me reading ur post. but insya allah, with Allah's guidance hopefully it would help you in making the right decision to lead a more meaningful life in the near future.take care my dear...and be strong.
sheida
pinkpesona.multiply.com

Ange said...

THE SAYING GOES "3RD TIME'S A CHARM"... thats why the 2nd didnt work - cos the 3rd will.

Melissa said...

Sorry to hear it didn't work out. Inshallah you find someone who will be perfect for you!

lala said...

Salams sister, I'm so sorry to hear this is happening!!! I will be sure to keep you in my duas. Please visit me over in my side of NC if you need anything!!! I'm so sorry things didn't work out :( But Allah swt knows best and you WILL find a wonderful man inshAllah perfect for you.

StylishMuslimah said...

it was the right thing to do, you shouldnt stay with someone you dont love. I hope your ok :)
zaenab xx

Yasmin (Umm Zayd) said...

Shukran for all the love. I really need it right now. Im just gonna take it one day at time, knowing that everything gets better in time.
MJ, I might just take you up on that offer, I need an escape right now.
Zaenab, its actually the other way around, he said he isnt attracted to me, so yea that hurts more but I'll be ok.
Ange, I hope the 3rd time is a charm but right now Im scared of a 3rd time.