Monday, October 6, 2008

I Have an Itch, Should I Scratch?

Please don't get weirded out by the post title. I don't have a yeast infection or a crazy skin condition lol. The itch I'm talking about is the baby itch. Some of you know what I'm talking about. That feeling that you just wanna have a child of your own to love and care for. It's funny cuz that feeling usually comes around when you spend a lot of time around another persons child, and for me I can't even tell the last time I was around a baby, maybe back in Ramadan at the masjid. Maybe I could be wrong but Im having that feeling.
I really dont wanna rush things. Im enjoying being newly married and spending time with my husband. People say that I should wait and just enjoy my marriage and enjoy each other first because once a child comes along everything is gonna change. I completely agree with it and I don't wanna rush anything but it's like my soul is craving a child, for lack of better words. I fully understand the responsibility that I child requires and that its not easy but there is so much blessing to it.
In my previous marriage, I became pregnant early on, about 2 months after we had gotten married. I ended up miscarrying around 2 1/2-3 months. Yea it was sad, but it was the qadr of Allah and now I see why it happened.
I've talked to my husband about it even before we got married and he said he's caught between 2 things. He said he wants to wait til after he finishes grad school, which is next year, but then on the other hand he really wants to have a child now, just one, and also to get his mom offhis back. You know how mothers are when they want grandchildren-thankfully my mom isn't part of that group but I know she'll be happy either way. I then asked him again after we got married and he said he wants to have children pretty soon.
So now Im thinking is soon like weeks, months away? Yea I know Im crazy but like I said it's that damn itch that won't go away. It's getting so bad that Im watching all those baby shows, like the one on TLC A Baby Story. I think he watched it with me, maybe he got the hint because honestly in a way that's what I was hoping to do. I would just accidently stumble across the show while channel surfing and become interested like Ive never seen it before. I know Im bad lol.
Insha'Allah, in the near future you might be reading about a bun in hte oven, but for now I'll try to be a bit more patient.

10 comments:

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StylishMuslimah said...

i think you should enjoy eachothers company for now because of your husbands schooling as well, having a child now could be rushing things a little. But thats just my opinion, Insha'Allah whatever is best for you will happen :D

Ange said...

red eyes: we know who salman rushdie is and we know his stupid views. we dont need any salman rushdie satanic fans here. go away with your shaytan.
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i think let it come as god wills. if he gives you a child tomorrow or next year then so be it - as long as your happy!

congrats again on the new marriage

Anonymous said...

I agree with Ange!!:-)

Yasmin (Umm Zayd) said...

Thanks, you are right. I should just leave in Allah SWT hands. Whatever happens, happens. If it's meant for to have a child, insha'Allah I will and if not, then so be it.

Yasmin (Umm Zayd) said...

Oh yea..thanks for being my blog bodyguard Ange lol ;)

StylishMuslimah said...

she asked me about his books as well, are they satanic? iv never heard of them..

Inspired Muslimah said...

Assalamu Alaikum Yasmin, I understand bc I have that same itch. However I am not yet married so my itch will have to wait. I think its wonderful but It may be a good idea to take a few months so you and your husband can enjoy one another but Allah knows best so if its meant to happen you will be blessed with one soon. Good luck!

Hijabee said...

I think this itch is contagious coz I have the same itch and the same questions that you're raising are on my mind. To wait or not to wait? But I guess in the end Allah decides for us!

Yasmin (Umm Zayd) said...

Yep exactly Hijabee. Allah knows the perfect time for us. Insha'Allah I'll try to be patient. I should let my husband know what's on my mind (even tho I let him read my blog from time to time, he thinks blogging is a great thing, but he hasn't read this post yet) cuz I don't wanna do something he isnt ready for yet. So I know both of us need to be ready, but Im beyond ready right now